Perverted Instructions

This month, I had to take the same test a few times. And one day, within a matter of hours, I had to take the same test twice.

Let me explain…

As I’ve become more intentional about my daily devotion time with the Lord, His voice has become clearer to me. And it’s great, especially when I’m listening for His “Yes,” “No,” or “Wait.” However, the clearer His voice becomes, I can hear His “Go” just as clearly.

And that’s the kind of test I’ve had to repeat a few times this month. “Go encourage them…” “Go pray for them…” “Go warn them…”

It’s one thing to do these tests in my head or under my breath. But to have to perform these tests literally and interact with people I don’t normally interact with? That’s too much! So, in those moments, I immediately tried to convince myself that it was me telling me to do those things. (This should have been my first red flag because our flesh never willingly volunteers to be in a position where it may possibly be rejected.) But then, the Spirit quickly interrupted my thoughts to confirm, “You know God’s voice.” So eventually, I completed the tests, but not as directed.

I perverted the instructions.

Specifically, I altered or distorted the instructions from what was first intended by God, before I completed His requests. For example, the Lord said, “Go call ___ and tell them ___” But instead of calling, I sent a text. And after I completed the test I applauded myself for obeying God. I thought that texting, versus calling, was a minor detail in the grand scheme of what God had told me to do. I even went on to brag to a friend about completing these tests. And the conversation was fine until she checked me about my disobedience.

I didn’t like the rebuke but her correction was a much needed reminder that partial obedience is still complete disobedience. And what if the sound or vibration of a phone call to someone, versus the sound or vibration of a text, makes the difference when interrupting a disagreement, an attack, or a suicide attempt. Moses struck the rock instead of speaking to the rock, as God instructed, and it cost him entry into the Promised Land. King Saul spared the life of an enemy instead of destroy every person and thing in his enemy’s camp, as God instructed, and it cost him his throne. So basically, “God said what He said and He requires us to do as He said.”

Accepting the reality that “God doesn’t need me,” is a humbling experience. But the fact that He wants to partner with me to accomplish good works, greater works. That’s privilege. So the least I can do is offer Him my obedience in gratitude.